


Breaking The Habit

by kimbleefucker (hihowareya)



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Kimblee deals with human emotions, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Roy deals with compulsive heterosexuality, everyone has a good time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-01
Updated: 2018-11-01
Packaged: 2019-08-14 09:34:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16490105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hihowareya/pseuds/kimbleefucker
Summary: It wasn't love. But it wasn't indifference anymore either. And that uncertainty didn't sit well with Solf J Kimblee. He distanced himself from Roy, with the hope that whatever foolish feelings trying to creep their way into his emotional peripheral would dissipate and he could go back to opening his legs for him without any sort of twinge of affection and enjoying sex for the act.





	Breaking The Habit

**Author's Note:**

> I had a 4 hour car ride so I crafted this... roy doesnt know how to deal with his emotions or anyone elses, and kimblee isnt much better.  
> Thank U to [u kno who u are] for inspiring this.... or my inspo

Today marked over a week since Roy had experienced any physical contact with Kimblee, and he started to wonder why he missed it. The passage of time was confusing for him, and he kept track before by counting the amount of times he'd left the other man's tent, but now he hadn't been there in almost 2 weeks. 

After one week he had felt himself missing the release of stress and anxiety, something that his own hands just couldn't seem to manage. He confronted Kimblee in an abandoned wasteland of a village at dusk and for the first time in a long time felt a twinge of passion in his confused body as he pushed the shorter man against a decaying wall and affectionately mouthed at his neck. Normally within minutes Kimblee's pale fingers would be in Roy's hair and his long legs hooked over the Flame Alchemist's waist, but not this time. The flat of his palms rested on Roy's chest almost like he would push him away, but he didn't. He wasn't eager for Roy to take him or even responsive to the other man's attention at all. 

Roy turned his neck to kiss at Kimblee's narrow jaw and trace his hands down the front of his white undershirt and paused at his belt. 

"Are you not feeling up to it?" He asked finally, though the answer was obvious. 

"Not especially." His voice sounded bitter and sticky, like he would rather be in bed alone than here. The Crimson Lotus alchemist slid a leg between Roy's and pressed his thigh into his groin. "But, I can tell you certainly are." 

Roy groaned at the contact and shifted against Kimblee's leg for friction. Kimblee considered him for a moment then allowed his hands to slide down to Roy's pants, undoing them without any pause. Roy pulled back to look in his eyes; they were the same as ever. Kimblee didn't break eye contact as his cool fingers reached into Roy's pants to free him, the teeth of the zipper scraping against the tops of his hand. Roy hissed at the skin to skin contact and watched Kimblee's unchanging expression as his hand slid along him slowly. Roy didn't have to vocalize his request. Without even blinking Kimblee elegantly sunk down to his knees in front of him.

It was unsettling to see him without a characteristic smirk or sultry glance positioning himself this way. 

"You don't have to do this if you don't want to." 

"I know." 

Roy closed his eyes and enjoyed the warm, wet heat and slipped his hands into Kimblee's hair, loosening the tie that held it tight. He positioned his arm so that the line of sight was finally broke, so he wouldn't have to admit the reality of the situation if he decided to open his eyes. He relished the feeling of Kimblee's hands on his thighs and the way his long nose would occasionally bump into Roy's body when he surged his head forward and swallowed hard around him. Only a few minutes passed and Roy's hips jerked and he hit his peak, tapping his fingers on Kimblee's forehead aggressively to warn him- something he apparently decided to ignore, because Roy didn't feel Kimblee pull away from him until he swallowed all Roy had to offer him. He pulled back and rose slowly back to stand, tapping his heel against the wall a few times to wake his leg back up that had fallen asleep. 

Roy adjusted himself and ruffled his hair and watched Kimblee wipe his mouth on the back of his hand. He figured he might as well return the favor and sunk to his own knees in front of Kimblee, who arched a narrow eyebrow at him quizzically.

"What are you doing?" 

"I should return the favor-" 

"No need." Kimblee's bemused expression slipped into a neutral one that Roy knew to be characteristic of him. "You'll just have to owe me one. I'll start a tab for you." He redid his ponytail and turned to leave when Roy grabbed his shoulder. 

"Are you angry at me?" 

"No- I don't have a reason to be, at least not yet. But that might change if you hold me up any longer. I do have a job to do you know." Roy knew how much pride Kimblee took in his work and his alchemy, and decided not to linger, he accepted Kimblee's statement at face value and let it go.

He'd hoped whatever had been eating the man to pass in time, perhaps after he took out a few dozen more Ishvalans, but even after that Roy did not see much of him. And so he was clamoring into his tent now, unannounced, to settle the matter.

"Mustang, to what do I owe the pleasure?" Kimblee looked up from a notebook he was scrawling in and over the rims of the reading glasses that sat on his nose. Roy wouldn't admit it out loud, but he was fond of the look on him. 

"You've been avoiding me." Getting right to the point, Roy slid his hands into his pockets and watched Kimblee close the notebook and set his glasses on it off to the side. He made no attempt to stand, and Roy found it strange to see Kimblee beneath him in a situation where he wasn't fervently servicing him. 

"Have I? You and I haven't been assigned to any of the same districts lately. A lot quicker to get the job done when they spread the best manpower out, don't you think?" 

"You know what I mean. I used to see you almost every other day, sometimes more than once on the same day... and now I haven't seen you in more than passing since a week ago." He fidgeted with his pocket watch in his pocket absentmindedly. "If you think I've done something wrong, then you could at least be up front about it." Roy had no time for hiding feelings. 

"If I felt that way, I would tell you."

Of course what Roy failed to recognize was Kimblee's earnest honesty. He hadn't thought Roy did anything wrong. If anything, he felt there was more something amiss with himself. 

In their time as... whatever it was they were, he would admit to no one except maybe a deep part of himself that he had a small fondness for the fellow alchemist. While he at first thought Roy was foolish and immature, his blunt nature and naïveté became appealing and sometimes he felt that perhaps Roy would- that Roy _could_ come to understand him someday. 

He found himself thinking, for the first time, about his life after the war. He wasn't a romantic, but there were fleeting moments where he thought of their intimate encounters and whether they would continue after the war, when there wasn't a self deprecating drive behind them. 

It wasn't love. But it wasn't indifference anymore either. And that uncertainty didn't sit well with Solf J Kimblee. He distanced himself from Roy, with the hope that whatever foolish feelings trying to creep their way into his emotional peripheral would dissipate and he could go back to opening his legs for him without any sort of twinge of affection and enjoying sex for the act.

But Roy always found him. No matter how he avoided him to let his feelings settle, Roy wouldn't be far behind to pluck at Kimblee's impulsive streak. A part of him facetiously wondered if it was some sort of sign, and now within the confines of his own space he felt cornered by his problem as it stared him down. 

Kimblee's neutral expression slid into one of soft amusement, and he looked up at Roy with half lidded eyes. 

"I'm sorry if you feel as though I've been cold to you. It wasn't my intention to spurn you." Roy seemed relieved as he sank down to join Kimblee on the bedroll. 

"That's good. You know, as much as I wouldn't like to admit it, I do rely on you..." Roy scratched the back of his head bashfully. "It's something keeping me sane here." His hand left his hair to move down to rest on Kimblee's thigh. 

Kimblee considered the consequences of giving in so easily, weighed against his genuine enjoyment of watching Roy fuck him with his despaired expression and decided he'd never cared much for consequences before, now would be a poor time to start. He reached a hand out to Roy's shoulder and gripped it only slightly, which Roy acknowledged as Kimblee's consent to his silent proposition. 

Roy leaned in to kiss him and when he had finally pressed his lips against the smaller aclhemist's, he reached his other hand around to undo the hair tie keeping Kimblee's ponytail up. Kimblee made a small sound against his mouth and Roy pulled back slightly. 

"Sorry, do you want it up?" 

"It doesn't matter. Forget about it." Kimblee leaned back into him and Roy tangled his hand in Kimblee's hair as his other lightly slid up his thigh. Normally there was little if any kissing involved, so to start off that way, Kimblee presumed Roy must feel especially needy; this suited him just fine.

Roy swiped his tongue over Kimblee's mouth to implore him to push further and found no resistance. The odd combination of peppermint with a lingering essence of tobacco greeted his tongue and he was all to eager to ignore it for the sensation of their intimate embrace. 

Once he'd had enough of it though, he moved to kiss along the long, pale line of Kimblee's throat. Solf leaned his head back to offer Roy all the access he needed. Roy pulled back suddenly and undid his military jacket and tossed it aside, and commanded Kimblee to lie down. He hummed to himself and complied happily. Roy leaned back down to kiss and lightly bite at Kimblee's neck while undoing his jacket as well, though not bothering to fully remove it but simply leave it open. He hiked up Kimblee's white under shirt and scooted himself back enough to kiss at Kimblee's exposed sternum. 

Roy would never get over it, how Kimblee seemed unable to keep weight on here. Though he didn't know him well enough to say his current condition was exclusive to Ishval, it still perturbed him. Still he ran his hands along the other man's sides and under his lower back and trailed his lips down the hollow of his stomach and stopped at his belt. He relished every moment he thought he felt Kimblee's back arch under his hands and the grip on his shoulders twitched and threatened to tighten.

At first Kimblee thought Roy might decide to pleasure him with real fervor and desire but instead saw Roy lean back and reach into his pocket to pull out small container of lubricant. Kimblee barked a laugh. 

"You brought that with you- you were that confident that I'd wantonly give myself to you?" His expression was smug and Roy suddenly felt less inclined to be so considerate of him.

"It was just in case. Don't get too cocky." Kimblee chuckled to himself and thought of denying Roy now out of spite, but decided to ignore that impulse. Roy undid and shimmied off his pants and boxers, and reached to do the same for his partner who allowed him to do as he pleased. 

Roy uncapped it and spread the lubricant on his fingers and held Kimblee at the notch of his hip with his free hand. Kimblee of course made no attempt to make the task any harder for him and moved his legs apart appropriately and finally arched his back sharply with no resistance when Roy did push his fingers into him. 

Roy found himself always enamored with watching Kimblee's responses beneath him, though he was usually fairly unresponsive and instead chose to berate or monologue at him. But sometimes he would slip and make a small noise or glance at him glassy-eyed and Roy would feel a heat pool in his stomach. 

As Roy pushed and pulled his wrist he pulled himself up to press his body to Kimblee's, rutting his half-hard erection against the other man's. He closed his eyes and leaned down and thought he felt Kimblee affectionately nuzzle into his shoulder, but wrote it off as an accident. Kimblee was not a man who did affection or feelings. 

After Roy felt he'd spent enough time on preparations and frottage he pulled back and retracted his wrist, pouring another generous amount of lubricant into his palm and spreading it over himself. He pulled himself closer and hooked Kimblee's legs over his hips, lining himself up and hastily thrusting himself forward with a grunt. Kimblee's hands still held his shoulders and he watched him with precision. 

Without much time in between Roy rushed to grab at Kimblee's hips for grounding as he aggressively vented his frustrations against him. 

"Y-you're awfully eager..." Kimblee purred at him, "what's your sudden inspiration?" 

"Don't talk..." Roy hushed him swiftly and Kimblee almost laughed; that's the Mustang he knew.

Roy closed his eyes and continued to harshly pound himself into Kimblee who panted shallowly beneath him. He reached a hand out blindly and tangled it in Solf's hair again. 

Kimblee watched Roy above him, fucking him with an expression of focus and lust, and Kimblee couldn't help but find it appealing. Almost absentmindedly a hand moved from the Flame Alchemist's shoulder to lightly trace cool fingers against Roy's cheek to feel his aggression for himself.

Roy's eyes snapped open at the feeling of curved tips of Kimblee's nails on his face. The tenderness was almost threatening. His eyes darted from the hand on his face to the face of the man it belonged to.

Generally Kimblee's expression was unreadable, he would lie on his back and mock Roy and stare as if he was looking at something far off that Roy could never see. He was never there, on any emotional level. So when Roy glanced at him and met his eyes that looked at him with utmost certainty, his rhythm faltered a bit and he swallowed hard. It was unnerving. 

But instead of feeling any connection, Roy felt an anger bubbling in him. Kimblee wasn't someone who cared for anyone, least of all him. And he knew Roy's penchant for sentimentality, and Roy was certain that Kimblee was mocking him still- though in a much more uniquely cruel manner. He almost wanted to punch him, but instead chose to lean over him and bend Kimblee's hips at an uncomfortable angle to fuck him that way. 

Kimblee didn't seem phased, and Roy gave up on trying to do anything about it. He moved the hand in Kimblee's hair to tangle in it and pull it slightly. He closed his eyes and pretended it was someone else he was sleeping with. He pictured her, a certain sniper and how soft her hair would feel in his hands and the heat of her body and how if he was with someone else it ought to be her. Imagined it was her hand against his face. That's what he should be doing, right? It would better suit him, to be with a woman, right? If Roy thought hard enough, he could turn Kimblee into the woman he thought he should be thinking about. But, admittedly, he found himself much more attracted to the man beneath him. 

It became clear to Kimblee after a few minutes that Roy was certainly in this for himself only and pulled the hand gripping Roy's shoulder down to his own body to touch himself in hurried strokes. His sharp blue eyes never leaving Roy's face for a second, wishing he could pierce him and drag his attention back to him. He saw Roy's lips mouth something faintly but in his stupor he was unable to parse it. His eyes fluttered at the thought of Roy daring to say his name and with only his hand passing over himself a few more times he arched his back and came with a quiet, warbled moan, the hand on Roy's face locking his fingers in his hair. 

Though Roy was aware Kimblee was already coming down from his high and overstimulated he didn't care and drove into him with exceedingly impassioned thrusts until his hand in Kimblee's hair tightened and he released with an uncharacteristic growl. His heart raced as his arms struggled to support him, and once he was able to focus again, pulled himself out of and off of Kimblee to fall to his side and roll onto his back.

Kimblee of course had already shaken off his afterglow and exhaled deeply, his eyes wandered to Roy, who also seemed to be shaking off his post-coital fuzziness. 

The reality of their relationship weighed in his mind. Roy had asked Kimblee to be honest and blunt with him, and he waffled over asking him for weeks now. Perhaps now, after their passionate coupling, Roy would perhaps release him from his wondering. Roy was staring up at the ceiling of the tent, breathing steadily now. He was almost ready to fall asleep when Kimblee spoke to him.

"What am I to you?" His eyes gleaming with anticipation, Roy answered him almost immediately, without any need for thought- because he was certain.

"Nothing, really. Just something to fuck."

Kimblee felt any sort of affection or care he held for Roy exorcised from his body all at once. 'Nothing'? He was reduced to nothing. 'Just something to fuck'. He repeated the words over and over in his head. Not even some _one_ but some _thing_. 

There was a nauseating feeling in his stomach for a moment, a physical testament to the anger he felt boiling in his body. His breathing quickened for a moment and his nostrils flared as his fingers thrummed against the bedroll. He sat up suddenly, deciding to leave this situation entirely. He picked is clothes up from the floor and redressed himself hastily, throwing his blue jacket over his shoulders instead of bothering to even push his post-sex shaken arms through the sleeves. He ran his fingers through his hair as he gathered it up to tie it back. 

Roy sat up on his forearms as he noticed Kimblee prepared for a hasty departure. 

"Hey- where are you going?" His tone was nonchalant. Kimblee looked over his shoulder at Roy and turned and exited the tent without looking back again. Roy scratched the back of his head, and laid back down for a few moments before gathering up his clothes and redressing himself to leave. 

He wouldn't speak to Kimblee again for 6 years. After that day Kimblee had avoided him more entirely. Roy heard of his impressive exploits in destroying the Kanda district, and of his turning traitor and being sent to prison. Sometimes he regretted letting the last thing he said to him be a dismissal of his humanity.

Shortly before Kimblee's release from prison, Roy did see him once. He thanked the warden for the guidance but requested privacy with the convicted murderer. Despite the warnings of the warden, he flashed his signature glove and assured him he was more than capable of defending himself. 

He stepped into the cell and saw Kimblee's eyebrow arch at him. 

"Well now, Roy Mustang." he glanced at the patch on his uniform. "My apologies, _Colonel_ Roy Mustang. To what do I owe the pleasure?" The title dripped with condescension. 

"I just happened to be here and I-"

"You just happened to be in prison?" Roy bit his tongue. 

"In the area. I thought I would pay you a visit." He slipped his hands in his pockets. "If you prefer I can leave."

"By all means, stay. I'm sure there's plenty of catching up to do." Roy approached him slowly, eyes glued to the shackles around his wrists. Caged like an animal.

"I don't have enough time to catch up. I'm not here to ask you why you did what you did. I'm here to repay a debt, actually." Kimblee frowned in confusion. Roy bent down to his knees, and Kimblee's eyes flashed in amusement. 

"Now this _is_ unexpected." 

Roy ignored his condescending tone and reached out to grope the other man through the cotton of the prison provided pants, feeling his fondling arouse him rather quickly. 

"I take it you can't really do much for yourself here..." He mumbled. 

Kimblee inhaled sharply at Roy's touch and cleared his throat. 

"Not exactly. This are fairly effective." He moved his wrists in the shackles. Roy glanced at them then back at the task at hand as he pulled the waistband of the other man's pants down to pull him free. The corner of Kimblee's mouth slid into a smirk as he watched excitedly, his face flushed in anticipation.

Roy pulled his watch from his pocket with his free hand and checked the time before replacing it in his pocket. He didn't have more than 10 minutes so he'd have to be fast- but given how sensitive Kimblee seemed to be it shouldn't take nearly that long. He exhaled through his nose and hastily brought his mouth down on his fellow alchemist's arousal until he felt it hit the back of his throat and he swallowed hard. 

Kimblee's hands instantly grasped at his hair. "Y-you've been practicing I see..." there was a jovial tone to his comment but it was lost in his audible moans that followed thereafter. Roy felt his head bump against the wooden shackles as he bobbed his head, eager to finish the job quickly. Though in the strangest of ways he found the scenario comfortingly nostalgic. 

It didn't take long before he felt Kimblee's hips twitch and his fingers tapped Roy's forehead lightly to tell him he would come soon- how that brought memories back- and Roy swallowed hard again and pulled his head off, though Kimblee's hands stayed attached to his hair. He stroked him frantically to completion and heard his choked gasp as he released finally, his grip on Roy's hair lightening as his hands let go. 

Roy gave him a few minutes to collect himself before standing up as Kimblee readjusted the waistband of his pants. 

"Did you really miss me that much, Roy?" His use of his first name made Roy sigh heavily. He truly was the same; no capacity for love or compassion in his heart. 

"No, Solf." He returned the favor spitefully. "I owed you one. Now I don't. We're even." He turned to the door to unlatch it, and a small part of Kimblee wished Roy would turn and look over his shoulder at him like he had done back then.

But he didn't, he let the door slam behind him, and Kimblee smiled inward to himself, amused at his own foolishness.


End file.
